29 Mar
Just Stop It Already!
Some years back, a brother visited his pastor to seek counseling for a matter that’s been weighing on his soul for some time — he just couldn’t resist doing certain things that he knew displease the Lord. Without fail, he would go through this full range of the most self-pitying emotions and come lament to me just what a failure he was.
The pastor counseled him on numerous occasions, and peace would reign for a few weeks before the whining started again.
On one such occasion, the pastor of the church was away, so the pastor from a sister congregation stood in for him. When the brother was done with the counseling session, he was fuming, muttering over and over to himself just what a lousy pastor that man was.
Surprised that the counseling session only took five minutes instead of the normal hour, I asked him what happened.
“That man is horrible!” he sputtered, his face red with anger and his fists clenched, “Not a word of comfort, not a word of encouragement, nothing!”
“Well, what did he say?” I persisted.
“Two words.”
“What? Get out? Go away? Shove off? What?”
“Stop it!”
“No, tell me.”
“Stop it!”
“Come on, seriously, tell me what that pastor said to you!”
“Ugh, you idiot, he told me to ’stop it’ and that was it.”
“Oh…”
At that time I too thought the pastor a little out of whack. I mean, seriously, what kind of advice was that? Where was the encouragement, and the exhortation, you know?
As I matured as a Christian, I realized that those two words are probably the best advice anyone in a cycle of sin can get. There’s no need to lament to others, and no need to waste others’ time by burdening their ears with “oh, I am such a wretched man/woman”.
In fact, those two simple words are so plain and simple one can easily internalize and remember them even if you cannot remember this entire verse in 1 Corinthians:
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
I saw the following video that Bob Newhart was in over at Tim Challies’ blog and it immediately reminded me of that brother. It’s rather funny but so very true.
Many times when we approach brothers and sisters to lament over our failings sinning against God, giving in to temptation etc., most of us aren’t looking for a way out, honestly.
I’m very much guilty of this as most.
We are looking for comforting words — aye, our ears are itchy to hear what we want to hear! We want to hear words to the effect that we are not alone in our sins, or we are just human to give in to temptations, etc. And if someone told us off like that pastor did, we’d be fuming too because our itchy ears didn’t get a good scratch.
Yet, it is such simple truth in two words — “STOP IT!” — and the best advice a loving brother or sister can give in my opinion, as Tim Challies so eloquently concluded in his article…
I can memorize Scripture from Genesis to Revelation and I can have the whole world pray for me. But there comes a time when forsaking sin, truly putting it to death, requires a decision of the mind and an act of the will. Sooner or later I need to just stop it. And God can give me the strength to do so.
Amen!
Shabbat Shalom.
Photograph “New York Stop Sign” by Stew Dean.
Tags: Bob Newhart, Christian Living, Sin, Stop, Temptation
Posted by Adullamite on 29.03.08 at 10:07
You can stop that sort of post right now!
Posted by Isaiah on 29.03.08 at 10:07
Good thing I caught the smiley, else I’d think you were trying to make me cry!
Posted by precious on 29.03.08 at 10:07
Hey brother, a friend of mine was in a vicious cycle of sin and she got out of it after listening to Joyce Meyer. She didn’t share with me the details though.
Last year, CHC invited Pst Joyce Meyer over. Curious, I decided to watch the sermon online.
And you know what? She convinced me that God will not let me be tempted beyond my ability. I’ve heard it and read it before, but her illustration (using a rocking chair) really dug in the concept for me.
I immediately broke out of my own cycle of sin too. Some people say she’s a heretic. I don’t understand why.
Posted by Carol on 29.03.08 at 10:07
I didn’t know Tim Challies had his town site. Something else to add to my list.
I’m reading his book now - The Discipline of Spiritual Discernment - very good so far. I’m half way through it and I already recommend it!
I have mixed feelings on the ’stop it’ thing. I know this sounds strange coming from me because I’m all for the “tough love” approach.
Posted by Isaiah on 29.03.08 at 10:07
heya Sis,
Glad to hear that!
As to why some regard her as a heretic and not so kindly (as I personally do), you might want to have a read at Abomination Nation, a blog run by my good friend and sis Carol exposing the falsehoods in Christianity today.
The link: http://abominationnation.blogspot.com/search/label/Joyce%20Meyer
Shalom!
Posted by Isaiah on 29.03.08 at 10:07
I’ve yet to get the book.
Yea, Carol, what’s up with the tofu approach?
Jokes aside, I think it’s just a good way to look at how one can start controlling our carnal urges to sin — simply stop thinking about doing whatever you know displeases God.
And it shouldn’t be a chore or difficult if one really loves the Lord, because a heart turned towards and loves Christ would seek to do all that pleases Him. After all, our Lord did say that His yoke is light.
Posted by Carol on 29.03.08 at 10:07
Isaiah,
I don’t have too many “soft spots” but if someone is having trouble with something, then I’m a big sucker. I’m not disagreeing with you, it’s just that it’s not the first thing that comes to mind. My reaction is to try to help them for as long as it takes but maybe there’s a fine line between doing that, and encouraging their problem. I don’t know - maybe I’ll just zip it.
Posted by Isaiah on 29.03.08 at 10:07
I know where you are coming from, Carol, and don’t worry about disagreeing with me.
I do it the soft approach for others too, but as with most posts here, this is really more of a reminder for myself than actually advocating it as a approach for anyone seeking help.
I know why I sin and I know what leads to some of them, and the “stop it” approach is for those.
Posted by Childlife on 29.03.08 at 10:07
You know, as I was reading the first part of this post, I was chuckling to myself, thinking about that Bob Newhart clip and wondering if you had seen it
I think you’re right Isaiah– sometimes the simplest advice is the best and all that needs to happen is for us to take ownership in our problems and ’stop it.’
I can see where Carol is coming from too though, sometimes all that someone needs who is struggling with something is a kind word and some encouragement and they find the strength to overcome.
I think this is one reason why God admonishes us to be prayerful. Only He knows the heart and if we are in a constant attitude of prayer, He can effectively lead us to meet the needs of others.
Posted by Isaiah on 29.03.08 at 10:07
Ugh, I am getting predictable.
I had a think on what Carol said a little later (yes, sometimes all your comments give me a buffet table-full of thoughts, lol!) and I think it all boils down to this:
If a person comes to you for help for the first time, I believe encouragement is the best way to advise that person. A little empathy is also helpful.
It IS a little harsh to give such advice to someone who comes to you for help the first time. Personally, I’d be insulted too.
However, if it’s someone who is whining about it all the time, and I mean ALL the time and keeps repeating the sin after much encouragement, then I think we can just tell him or her to just try starting to take some responsibility for it and “stop it”.
Just my take on it.
Posted by mrs. maverick on 29.03.08 at 10:07
hi isaiah,
found you on pulpit-pimps. just in case you didn’t catch my message there- thought i’d leave one here. anyhoo, enjoyed the clip! LOL.
i’m in agreement that meekness is the first response toward a brother/sister in sin. however, in dealing with someone habitually sinning and lamenting about it- telling them to stop it seems to get to the root of it.
oft times, the truth of the matter is that we love/desire our sin more than we desire obedience. yeah, i know, that’s awful for us professing Christ, but it is what it is.
hope i don’t sound like i’m making light of the issue.
mav
Posted by Isaiah on 29.03.08 at 10:07
hi Mrs. Maverick,
Thank you for dropping by. I’m sorry I didn’t see the message you left for me at Melvin’s. There were so many comments there, lol!
What you said is me in a nutshell many times over: “oft times, the truth of the matter is that we love/desire our sin more than we desire obedience. yeah, i know, that’s awful for us professing Christ, but it is what it is.”
And that’s the reason why I said I wrote this more for myself than anyone else. I don’t counsel people much really, but on the odd occasion when I do, it’s usually the soft approach.
I’d like to think that we should be harsher with ourselves than with others.
Shalom!